You’re Killin’ Me

Influence travels farther than we realize.

During one of my leadership roles, I used the phrase “you’re killin’ me” to signal concern or discomfort with a statement or decision. It was never meant to be disrespectful — just shorthand I used with my staff, peers, and occasionally leadership.

One day, I was sitting in a senior leadership meeting. We were going around the table discussing departmental wins and challenges. In the middle of the discussion, the senior leader running the meeting used the same phrase:

“You’re killin’ me.”

I remember popping my head up in that moment.

Not because the phrase mattered — but because something small I had said casually had traveled from my office to the boardroom.

That moment stayed with me.

Leadership has a way of amplifying even the smallest behaviors — phrases, tone, habits — whether we intend it or not.

People notice.

People repeat.

And sometimes influence shows up long before we realize we’re having it.

Leadership isn’t just what you say intentionally — it’s what gets repeated after you leave the room.

Over time, those small repetitions shape culture far more than any policy could.